Getting Sauced: Texas Pete from Souvlaki’s, Athens Oh. Magnifier Test (+4 & +2).
A few weeks ago I took all the loose change that had been accumulating in a bucket in my bedroom to the CoinStar change counter at a local grocery market. I carried the bucket into the store and got distracted upon entry at the floral department. A woman there was cutting and throwing away bushels of flowers, so I set the bucket of change in a grocery cart and discussed with her how I could get some of the flowers she was throwing away and give them to some pretty girls I know. (This is a true story.) After getting a makeshift bouquet, I set it in the cart located a few feet away and turned into the produce section.
I grabbed a head of lettuce, and when I turned to place it in cart, the cart was empty. There was no bucket of change in the cart. I slowly raised my head and remained calm. I scanned the tomato and pear stands and then the sweet corn shucking booth that had a display stand for Diamond Brand Walnuts on it’s far end. I nonchalantly began cruising the deli section peering into every cart to see if it held my bucket of change among the shopper’s sundries. I realized time was of the essence, and I began to speed up my pace as I pushed around my cart with a makeshift bouquet of flowers and began to make no apologies for stopping and peering into each cart I passed.
Somebody had highjacked my grocery cart and stole off with my loot. I was unsure if the theft was deliberate, or an honest case of mistaken grocery cart identity. No matter, I wanted my change back and whoever had it, if they were still in the store, I did not know for how much longer. I grabbed the bouquet of flowers and ditched my otherwise empty cart so I could speed up my searching. I ran up and down the bakery, snack and cracker, and personal hygiene aisles, and as I rounded the end of the shelves and into the meat section, I spotted the bucket. It was sitting quietly in the bottom of a shopping cart just 10 feet away. It was getting covered up with large slabs of pork ribs by an older man. I could only see his back as I approached. He was wearing gold chains on a Florida retirement-home-tanned neck, and was wearing a Guayabera shirt. Before I said a word to him, I reached in and grabbed the bucket while he was leaning into the freezer chest to haul out some more meat.
“Fixing for a Barbe-que?” I asked him, as I stood there holding my bucket of change once again. I was nearly out of breath as he turned around.
“I am taking my money back.” I said in a half accusatory, half apologetic tone.
“Oh!” he said smiling. “Was that in my cart?” before I could tell if he was sincere in his surprise, he continued and said “I thought somebody had broken their piggy bank.” The piggy bank joke didn’t go over well, but at least I smiled as I stared at the stacks of pork ribs sitting in his cart under the fluorescent lights of King Soopers.
I made it to the front counter and bought the flowers and when the change was finally counted, I had $52.30. An amount doubly valuable to me after the near loss and recovery of it all. I cashed it out for an Amazon.com gift card and have been buying some great things with it. I will share more of my purchases soon, however the first items I ordered were a set of ‘Close-Up’ filters for a 58mm diameter lens barrel. They fit quite nice on my 50mm camera lens and I can now, 6 years later, finish my project of photographing all the condiment packages of all the late night eateries that kept me company after getting sauced in my graduate school days.